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                             Charge of The Phone Goddess  

     Listen to the words of the Phone Goddess, who in days of old was 
     called Mama Cass, Ma Barker, Moms Mabley, the last of the Red Hot 
     Mamas, and by many other names not mentionable in mixed company. 
     Whenever you have need to make a call, preferably long distance, 
     and better it be when the rates are high, then shall ye assemble your 
     funds in some convenient place to pay me, who am Queen of all Highway 
     Robbery. These ye shall assemble, ye who are fain to bankruptcy yet 
     have not sent me all your earnings. To these shall I send bills as are 
     yet unheard of. Ye shall be free from bank accounts, as a sign that 
     ye be truly free ye shall be naked from my rates. And ye shall sing, 
     talk, shout, trade gossip and love, all at your own expense. Let your 
     fingers do the walking through my yellow pages. Let none stop you or 
     turn you aside, just call information. For mine is the dial tone that 
     opens upon the busy signal of life, which is the princess phone of 
     immorality. Mine is the poverty of the masses, and call now, pay 
     later. For my law is profit before people. Today I give knowledge of 
     facts you do not wish to have, and tomorrow calls that will sell you 
     things you do not wish to own. For behold, I demand everything in 
     sacrifice. I am the next best thing to being there, and my bills are 
     sent out upon the earth.   (- Magenta G. and Steve P-C, 1982) 


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