LATEST FROM "GOP PROPAGANDA MACHINE"
In the Carpathian Mountains, hidden deep in a cave, is the
infamous GOP Propaganda Machine. Warped, bitter old men, with no
meaning to their lives, puff smelly cigars as they invent new
tales about dashing Bill Clinton, the U.S. President.
In the dimly-lit cavern, they cackle with glee as they hatch
supposed "news" items meant to splatter the clean-cut image of
our beloved William J. Clinton.
(Lurking in the shadows, behind the table around which the GOP
propagandists are hunched, the apparent face of "Black Dog
Paulson" can be barely distinguished.)
The dried-up old men of the GOP Propaganda Machine, whose own
days of youthful pleasure are long since gone, have a penchant
for libidinous tales. They delight in portraying chaste and
church-going Bill Clinton as a modern Don Juan, obsessed with
And, it is to be noted, the Carpathian Mountains are not so far
from Italy, home of the secret society, P-2 -- also known as
From their Carpathian cave, the word goes out: this time to
their apparent tool, the scandal sheet known as *The Star*. From
thence, unwitting dupes of the GOP conspiracy -- such as
Conspiracy Nation (CN) and its "Editor-in-Chief" -- are sucked in
by the lurid details. Though kindly "pro journalists" do their
best to steer such dupes away from the propagandists' infamy and
onto the Correct And True Path(tm), their selfless efforts are
sometimes in vain.
And so, CN picks up the tale and passes it along to its readers,
*The Star* (9/10/96) has as its cover story the "White
House Call Girl Scandal." I am providing here additional
details which may not yet be known to readers. The two
major protagonists in the unfolding story are Dick Morris,
a top political advisor to President Clinton, and Sherry
Rowlands, a reputed "call girl" said to have been paid
$200/hour by Morris in return for sex.
ITEM: Morris is said to have told Rowlands, "they've got
to protect me -- I'm the only one who can get Bill
ITEM: According to *The Star*, the Rowlands/Morris love
nest was paid for by Clinton campaign funds.
ITEM: *The Star* hints that over $12,000 paid by Morris to
Rowlands this past year may have come out of his expense
account and not from his own private funds. Based on
information from Chuck Hayes, of "5th Column" fame, as
broadcast on the Media Bypass Hour (9/3/96, shortwave,
5.065 MHz, 10 - 11 pm CST), White House Press Secretary
Mike McCurry has denied that such private funds were used.
*But*, Hayes predicts that McCurry is going to have to make
a retraction; that expense account money was directly used
in return for "services rendered" by Rowlands.
ITEM: Morris is said to have sat through high-level White
House meetings, preoccupied by "sexual daydreams about top
women staffers with hot legs and brightened fingernails and
ITEM: Morris reportedly says that President Clinton "lacks
compassion and common sense" and frequently explodes into
ITEM: Morris reportedly says the White House is now full
of intrigues and plots amongst several factions therein.
ITEM: According to Rowlands, Morris describes the
Whitewater scandal as "Hillary's little Whitewater mess."
ITEM: There reportedly has been in the works a White House
plan to market a "U.S.-approved" label to be sold by the
government to foreign factories which pass U.S.
inspections. Presumably, this would help prevent sweatshop
conditions in foreign factories.
ITEM: Morris apparently was himself hep to the GOP
Propaganda Machine! He is reported by *The Star* to have
confided to Rowlands that, "I've got some people from the
Republican Party who would really love to get hold of a
story like this -- they could use it against me."
Next week in *The Star*, by Sherry Rowlands: "My White
House Love Diaries."